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Still, there was plenty of entertainment from watching other punters somersault backwards off the small pink pouffes that form the on-floor seating if they laughed too hard. Remarkably civilised.Kabaret, 5 Upper John St, London W1 (0171-287 8111)SOHO STYLEBlues42 Dean St, W1 (0171-494 1966) Classy little cocktail bar with American bistroThe French House 49 Dean St, W1 (0171-437 2799) It’s rare to get a seat, but the staff are adorableThe Yard Bar 57 Rupert St, W1 (0171-437 2652) Sunny Med-style gay bar. Sitting on a corner banquette, we ploughed through a bottle of wine at pounds 15 (okay, but this is Soho on a Saturday) and a couple of cocktails, and waited for the cabaret to start. In fact, on the night we dropped into this spaciously laid-out subterranean hangout, we were greeted by a relaxed crowd of professional middle-youthers, obviously relieved to be away from the usual media, advertising and PR juniors who tend to dominate the area.
There are, I think, two things that contribute to this: first, they don’t open until 9.30pm, which cuts out the after-work and pre-bedtime crowd; and second, table service means the floor simply can’t afford to be as crammed with surly 18- to 24-year-olds who don’t see why they should let anyone else get past. So I have to admit to being pleasantly surprised by Kabaret. The place has gleaned so much Palmer-Windsor-Bowles-style coverage that I had dim expectations of the usual Soho thing, only posh to boot. Thanks to the ever-ready presence of the weekend Soho clone, up from the ‘burbs ready to look their fellow drinkers up and down for a few hours before doing the same thing to fellow clubbers, these bars are now frighteningly predictable.

The clone, after all, doesn’t have much time for anything other than polished metal, a couple of “interesting” design tweaks daubed by some trustafarian friend of the owner, and a door policy that convinces everyone of its exclusivity throughout the full four weeks of its novelty value. Sometimes you get the weary feeling that you can’t tell one Soho bar from another. H2G2, a self-deprecating exception to the standard hyperbole of the web, styles itself the “Official Earth Edition of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.” And, insofar as this simple site largely comprises the discussions and comments of anyone who feels like contributing a line or two on, well, anything, it strives to live up to this inclusivity description – a miniature version of the Web itself, in fact.. Over the quarter- of-a-century since Hitchiker’s appearance, Adams, besides writing, has had various involvements in computer games, an interest which brought him inevitably to the web.

And in case you’re still wondering about the curious title of this piece, Resign Managua is, of course, an anagram of Anagram Genius.Don’t panic www.h2g2 Douglas Adams unwittingly provided a facetious definition of the web with the title of his classic radio series, book, television series and soon-to-be-film, The Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The first dreams up meaningless management-speak declamations while the second creates essays of po-mo gobbledygook jargon, replete with fake bibliography. Those of you for whom the constant use of their mother’s maiden name as a password is getting a tad tired can go to the Password Generator ( www.lilli /gpw.html). It generated half-a-dozen nonsensical yet distinctive words for me instantly.
Pertinent only in the sense that they develop the wordplay are Dilbert’s Mission Statement Generator ( www.unitedmedia /comics/dilbert/career) and the Postmodernism Generator ( www.csse.monash.edu.au/other/postmodern.html). The Web is a forum for a huge number of other low-level wordplay generators. It’ll also rehash any phrase you provide it and e-mail you the result: Mike Higgins netgains writer rearranges into he is wire-netting as grim king Hmmm. And some of its most gratifying manifestations are its most simple.

Take Anagram Genius, for instance (right), one of countless similar sites. It offers you various anagram entertainments including a database to which you can add, and a downloadable anagram programme. The web took the buzz-word of “interactivity” and successfully turned it from a nebulous concept into a reality. The chair is high-backed and made from honey-coloured Balu wood, but you’ll need to treat it with preservative if it is left outside all year Call the Cotswold Company on 0990 502233.. Contact him at 2, Garden Cottages, Highden, Washington, West Sussex RH20 4BA (01903 877373).
The phrase “packed flat” rings warning bells for me, but if you are safe in charge of a screwdriver, a Louisiana rocking chair kit can be yours for pounds 119. His folding cruise chair, modelled on one that he saw in Belize, is made of ash and costs pounds 195.

It’s low and rounded, pleasantly squidgy and costs pounds 295 For details, call 0171-355 3880. Furniture maker Bill Brown makes tables and tents as well as garden chairs. An old wooden (or Lloyd Loom) chair, a can of spray paint, and you can provide garden seating for less than pounds 10 a throw. At the other end of the range is Kenneth Turner’s sea grass chair, which doesn’t mind being left out in the rain. GARDENS ARE for sitting in as well as working at – though wherever I sit, I always see something that needs doing, so the sitting is short lived Junk shops are a useful hunting ground for garden chairs. Rather, she is sad that the row has created such a rift in the town.